Hello buddies :D

Okey, don't you think the title sounds like a suicide thing? Well, i once have had this kind of thought (when i was a kid ). When my mom scolded me and there's nobody i can turns to, since my brother also mad at me i talked to my mom like these..'biarlaa, sa p bunuh diri ni.sa p minum tu racun'...

Thinking back on this really embarrassed me. Why on earth i talked like that? Ever since i said that to my mom, she never scolded me anymore in her usual. She talked to me differently and she treated me more gentle. She was of course really afraid of what i maybe do to myself but the truth is i didn't have much guts to do as i've told her. It was such a childish and stupid way of getting her attention and stop scolding me that time. Right now, i tried to understand what was her feelings on the time. HURTS. I'm really sure about this. She maybe thinking of why such a little girl would say like that. I'm just 9 years old that time and i still don't know what life really is. It was my mistakes anyway but why i have to talk like that?!

I'm not that proud of what i've done to my mom and the regrets of hurting her that way remains forever. As i've grown up enough now and able to think what is right and wrong, that was the most regretful thing i ever done to my mom. If not by her patience towards me, i'll not have the chance to live a beautiful life just like what i have now. Thank you mom. I will keep pray for you and please watch me from above.

So dear readers, no matter how hard and difficult life you have and no matter how bad peoples and surround treated you never ever do a stupid things to end your own life. Cakap biar BERLAPIK, berfikir and bertindaklah secara rasional.

p/s : May your soul rest in peace mom. Always miss you.